Unsurprising to anyone who knows me,there have been times when I feel the urge to kill someone. Not to the point of actually doing it,of course,though with my neighbors,I’ve come close.
You may wonder just what it is about the couple upstairs (and the two ill-tempered brat-monsters they call “children”) that makes me want to toss them into Mount St. Helens. Without getting into too much detail,they are rude,selfish,loud,insane,and utterly unconcerned about the welfare of anyone else in the apartment building in which Wife and I reside.
If it isn’t clear,I despise these loathsome excuses for humanity,and that makes me want to kill them. I’m sure you know the feeling.
But what about killing those you love? If you write fiction,your answer is,Been there,done that.
A recent article in a reputable publication chronicled the inability of a prominent author to kill off his characters,even those who should be 293 years old. Being that I have had similar struggles — and,as I streamline my novel and remove sections with as much delicacy as a farmhand wielding a scythe — I wonder how much difficulty other writers have with this,even the really good ones. (Especially the really good ones.)
Rinse and repeat
The old writing saw about “giving away your children”is sadly true. Writers tend to fall in love with sections of their work that really has no business being in a particular piece. This is true for both scenes and characters. The reasoning is that because it entertains us,the writers,it’s got to be good,no?
When you have to cut out something that is well-written,it’s like admitting to your partner that she was right about any domestic matter. Humiliating,yes,but necessary to keep the peace.
For instance,there was one scene in my novel that chronicled a meeting between the teen-age narrator and his (much older) tormentor,taking place at the latter’s house,a faux-Graceland,complete with gates and jungle room. The older man was a professional wrestler who had graduated magna cum laude from Yale and had one of the world’s largest collections of contemporary Jesus art.
I have to admit:the scene had real drama,snappy dialog,and (dare I say it) some evocative writing. The house is rendered in fine detail,and the characters are full and flawed. The scene just rocks,in my humble opinion.
So of course,I had to nuke it,because the scene had absolutely nothing to do with the story. Ostensibly a plot device,this meeting turned out to be a nice set piece to show off my chops and nothing more. It was hard to pull the trigger,but I had to rid myself of about 2,000 words that were pretty durn good.
If you write fiction long enough,you will end up offing more characters than a serial killer. I know of one writer who doesn’t rewrite — a brilliant talent,to be sure — who simply starts from scratch when a story isn’t working out. Us mere mortals can’t indulge in such luxuries. We revise and revise and revise (and sometimes,it still sucks).
More killing needed
I’ve ruined perfectly good short stories with extraneous crap,which to some might be the natural inclination of a novelist,but to others,the indication of a someone who just can’t edit for shit.
What characters or scenes have you had to trash from your fiction? Or,better yet,what novels did you wish had trashed a few characters and scenes? I’ll start off with “Anna Karenina,”chock full of so much lard that it resembles the vat at a rendering plant,and let you take it from there.
If you want to rant about your asshole neighbors,that’s cool,too.
AHAHA!! Asshole neighbors-the “manager”upstairs? I get to hear his woman when they have sex.
I don’t really care how much fun she’s having. SHUT HER UP!
And,I think I’d do better at this category with movies. Crap. Can’t think of a single book…
I write lean,so there isn’t much flesh to flense.Probably should add more descriptive fat.
Think a lot depends on how big boned a story is –some skeletons can carry more weight.
AHAHA!! Asshole neighbors-the “manager”upstairs? I get to hear his woman when they have sex.
I don’t really care how much fun she’s having. SHUT HER UP!
And,I think I’d do better at this category with movies. Crap. Can’t think of a single book…
AHAHA!! Asshole neighbors-the “manager”upstairs? I get to hear his woman when they have sex.
I don’t really care how much fun she’s having. SHUT HER UP!
And,I think I’d do better at this category with movies. Crap. Can’t think of a single book…
I had to cut this scene from my bosnia novel where one of the main characters is trying to get out of Sarajevo and he swims across a river at night. At the same time a group of people,some families,are also trying to get out of the city and are crossing a bridge upstream within sight of the main character. The people on the bridge are attacked with mortars and killed,their bodies floating past the main character as he swims across. Very vivid writing,great sense of the despair and tragedy of the war,startling images –but it had to go because it didn’t fit. There were actually established routes out of Sarajevo and it made more sense to have him use one of those routes –but I still miss the starkness of that scene. there were lots of other scenes as well.
Great post. My downstairs neighbors moved out in the middle of the night about two weeks ago. They probably won’t come back to collect the posted eviction letters on their door. My across the driveway neighbors are the nicest husband and wife. In their 70s. The wife has an awesome wig for every day of the week. They let my visitors park in their driveway when mine is full.
madame d.:have you considered recording their lovemaking,grunts and moans all,then broadcasing it online? could make for some great radio.
movies are ok,too.
bernita:you are blessed. i can’t underwrite something if my life depended on it.
quinn:that scene does sound amazing. (the image of the bodies floating by gives me chills.) made me want to read it. but if it doesn’t fit,it doesn’t fit. thought about spinning it off into a story?
fringes:were the downstairs rent-skippers a problem? those types usually are. glad you have nice neighbors across the way —wigs and all.
I write lean,so there isn’t much flesh to flense.Probably should add more descriptive fat.
Think a lot depends on how big boned a story is –some skeletons can carry more weight.
I write lean,so there isn’t much flesh to flense.Probably should add more descriptive fat.
Think a lot depends on how big boned a story is –some skeletons can carry more weight.
“i write lean”–that’s a great line,bernita. i’m the same way.
i wish i could overwrite. then i’d be able to tackle a novel.
The rent-skippers banged on their ceiling/my floor whenever they thought we were making too much noise as we breathed. Where are we? Brooklyn 1957?
Here’s to better neighbors next time for us both.
I had to cut this scene from my bosnia novel where one of the main characters is trying to get out of Sarajevo and he swims across a river at night. At the same time a group of people,some families,are also trying to get out of the city and are crossing a bridge upstream within sight of the main character. The people on the bridge are attacked with mortars and killed,their bodies floating past the main character as he swims across. Very vivid writing,great sense of the despair and tragedy of the war,startling images –but it had to go because it didn’t fit. There were actually established routes out of Sarajevo and it made more sense to have him use one of those routes –but I still miss the starkness of that scene. there were lots of other scenes as well.
I had to cut this scene from my bosnia novel where one of the main characters is trying to get out of Sarajevo and he swims across a river at night. At the same time a group of people,some families,are also trying to get out of the city and are crossing a bridge upstream within sight of the main character. The people on the bridge are attacked with mortars and killed,their bodies floating past the main character as he swims across. Very vivid writing,great sense of the despair and tragedy of the war,startling images –but it had to go because it didn’t fit. There were actually established routes out of Sarajevo and it made more sense to have him use one of those routes –but I still miss the starkness of that scene. there were lots of other scenes as well.
Great post. My downstairs neighbors moved out in the middle of the night about two weeks ago. They probably won’t come back to collect the posted eviction letters on their door. My across the driveway neighbors are the nicest husband and wife. In their 70s. The wife has an awesome wig for every day of the week. They let my visitors park in their driveway when mine is full.
Great post. My downstairs neighbors moved out in the middle of the night about two weeks ago. They probably won’t come back to collect the posted eviction letters on their door. My across the driveway neighbors are the nicest husband and wife. In their 70s. The wife has an awesome wig for every day of the week. They let my visitors park in their driveway when mine is full.
Many years ago I had some really rude,whiote trash neighbors in my building. I was constantly at odds with them.
One day I opened the window and starte beating the dust and dirt out of a rug.
Ten minutes later,said white trash woman and her son are standing at my door. They start yelling at me saying I purposely dumped dirt on the kid’s head.
I had no idea he was under my 4th floor window. As we had run ins before I knew my please of innocence would fall on deaf ears.
It ended with some yelling and fist shaking.
It also ended with me secretly satisfied that tthe little monster got what he deserved.
le:when it comes to overwriting,i have only one thing to say to you:practice,practice,practice. you could also try reading the great overwriters of the world (garcia-marquez and rushdie come to mind).
fringes:amazing how the psycho ones don’t pay the rent. on the other hand…
phoenix:now that’s how to deal the the brat. dump on him,and you don’t even know you had done it. you can pick your friends,but you can’t pick your neighbors.
madame d.:have you considered recording their lovemaking,grunts and moans all,then broadcasing it online? could make for some great radio.
movies are ok,too.
bernita:you are blessed. i can’t underwrite something if my life depended on it.
quinn:that scene does sound amazing. (the image of the bodies floating by gives me chills.) made me want to read it. but if it doesn’t fit,it doesn’t fit. thought about spinning it off into a story?
fringes:were the downstairs rent-skippers a problem? those types usually are. glad you have nice neighbors across the way —wigs and all.
madame d.:have you considered recording their lovemaking,grunts and moans all,then broadcasing it online? could make for some great radio.
movies are ok,too.
bernita:you are blessed. i can’t underwrite something if my life depended on it.
quinn:that scene does sound amazing. (the image of the bodies floating by gives me chills.) made me want to read it. but if it doesn’t fit,it doesn’t fit. thought about spinning it off into a story?
fringes:were the downstairs rent-skippers a problem? those types usually are. glad you have nice neighbors across the way —wigs and all.
“i write lean”–that’s a great line,bernita. i’m the same way.
i wish i could overwrite. then i’d be able to tackle a novel.
“i write lean”–that’s a great line,bernita. i’m the same way.
i wish i could overwrite. then i’d be able to tackle a novel.
Ugh @ neighbours. Mine are horrible too.
I cut my darlings without a problem. Just slash the buggers out of the MS if they have no business there. It used to upset me,but these days it doesn’t. I chopped half a chapter today,just highlighted and pressed delete. If it isn’t there to be seen,it can’t torment me by asking if it can stay.
)
The rent-skippers banged on their ceiling/my floor whenever they thought we were making too much noise as we breathed. Where are we? Brooklyn 1957?
Here’s to better neighbors next time for us both.
The rent-skippers banged on their ceiling/my floor whenever they thought we were making too much noise as we breathed. Where are we? Brooklyn 1957?
Here’s to better neighbors next time for us both.
Many years ago I had some really rude,whiote trash neighbors in my building. I was constantly at odds with them.
One day I opened the window and starte beating the dust and dirt out of a rug.
Ten minutes later,said white trash woman and her son are standing at my door. They start yelling at me saying I purposely dumped dirt on the kid’s head.
I had no idea he was under my 4th floor window. As we had run ins before I knew my please of innocence would fall on deaf ears.
It ended with some yelling and fist shaking.
It also ended with me secretly satisfied that tthe little monster got what he deserved.
Many years ago I had some really rude,whiote trash neighbors in my building. I was constantly at odds with them.
One day I opened the window and starte beating the dust and dirt out of a rug.
Ten minutes later,said white trash woman and her son are standing at my door. They start yelling at me saying I purposely dumped dirt on the kid’s head.
I had no idea he was under my 4th floor window. As we had run ins before I knew my please of innocence would fall on deaf ears.
It ended with some yelling and fist shaking.
It also ended with me secretly satisfied that tthe little monster got what he deserved.
le:when it comes to overwriting,i have only one thing to say to you:practice,practice,practice. you could also try reading the great overwriters of the world (garcia-marquez and rushdie come to mind).
fringes:amazing how the psycho ones don’t pay the rent. on the other hand…
phoenix:now that’s how to deal the the brat. dump on him,and you don’t even know you had done it. you can pick your friends,but you can’t pick your neighbors.
le:when it comes to overwriting,i have only one thing to say to you:practice,practice,practice. you could also try reading the great overwriters of the world (garcia-marquez and rushdie come to mind).
fringes:amazing how the psycho ones don’t pay the rent. on the other hand…
phoenix:now that’s how to deal the the brat. dump on him,and you don’t even know you had done it. you can pick your friends,but you can’t pick your neighbors.
Ugh @ neighbours. Mine are horrible too.
I cut my darlings without a problem. Just slash the buggers out of the MS if they have no business there. It used to upset me,but these days it doesn’t. I chopped half a chapter today,just highlighted and pressed delete. If it isn’t there to be seen,it can’t torment me by asking if it can stay.
)
Ugh @ neighbours. Mine are horrible too.
I cut my darlings without a problem. Just slash the buggers out of the MS if they have no business there. It used to upset me,but these days it doesn’t. I chopped half a chapter today,just highlighted and pressed delete. If it isn’t there to be seen,it can’t torment me by asking if it can stay.
)